The Runaways

Have you ever seen a rock and roll biopic? Or any biopic of any famous musician? If the answer is yes, then you’ve already seen this movie and know how it plays out. According to Hollywood, every single musical act was the greatest success in the history of music. Every band is plagued by drugs and infighting when the trappings of success become too much to handle. And were you aware the rock stars play on their sex appeal and fuck a lot? Shocking, I know.

You will also be not at all surprised to learn that Kristen Stewart (playing Joan Jett) still can’t act. She looks uncomfortable all the time and when your livelihood depends on being in front of a rolling camera all the time, that’s not a good thing. She can, however, sing. That is her voice in the film, and if you saw her in Into the Wild, you’ll know she has some talent in this regard.

Dakota Fanning plays Cherie Currie. Unlike Stewart, Fanning is an outstanding actress but to see her cavorting in lingerie, making out with other chicks and having her period right in the opening scene, well, it’s just icky. I know I can’t stop her from getting older but I just really wish she wouldn’t get so old so fucking fast. Remember her in I Am Sam? This will bitchslap the innocence right out of that image. It’s actually quite jarring.

Know who should be pissed at this movie? Lita Ford. Lita Ford was a HUGE success in the 80’s and is a highly influential guitarist and musician who was a big part of the Runaways. Unless you watch this flick, because then she’s barely visible except for her resentment of Cherie.

Dull, lifeless, uncomfortable, predictable but with great music. You probably won’t regret renting this but you shouldn’t be in any rush to do it.

I rate this movie 4 out of 10